Who is Miss Glitchee?

WHO IS MISS GLITCHEE™?
I am who I am, I am in the act of creating myself, and I can only do that in the space of who I am not--
and so I have carefully created who I am not in order to experience who I actually am.^^

Thursday, March 28, 2013

SOLACE**

*SOLACE (n.) a feeling of comfort that makes you feel less sad

I've never regarded myself as a weak person.
Most of my life-- I have tried  to put on a brave face.
I've given it my best shot each and every time.
I've refused to give up.
Life made me tough-- it made me a fighter.
And I took pride in that idea that I could
perfectly manage my life.
Yeah, I once fooled myself into an exaggerated regard
of my own capability to take care of myself.



But then, no matter how strong you try to be--
there will come a time when your foundations will be shaken.
When your strength will be put on the line.
And you'll hail to question yourself and your own capacities.



When you'll get to seek even for your own shortcomings.
You'll ask yourself--
What did I do?
What did I not do?
What could have I done?
Where did did things start to fall apart?
Why did I fail?
And you'll lose even your life long ideals
in face of grave pain and unreciprocated anger.
You'll break down and you'll yield to your own frailty.
You'll find yourself no where to run,
nothing to depend upon.
For you are just you.
Just like I am just me--
I am small, 
I am weak,
I am vulnerable,
I am helpless,
I am powerless.
I am nothing in the vastness of this world.


In those darkest  hours of  our lives,
we get to turn to the ONLY SOLACE that there is.
The only source of light.
The utmost fount of love.
The root of all happiness.
The spring that can relentlessly endow our satisfaction.
The eminent meaning of our lives.
The sole giver of mercy that will empty every pain in our hearts.
The author of our lives.



And it maybe a shame that I get to go through toil
just to appreciate HIM more.
Yet I am blessed to be embraced and saved again and again.
A NOTHING in the salvation of GOD--the EVERYTHING.



**a lent reflection

Monday, March 18, 2013

NOM DE PLUME

**NOM DE PLUME (n.) an author's pseudonym




I am a writer.
I write, that's what I do, that's who I am.
I write my thoughts without trying to please everyone.
I scribble my emotions without fear of being discorded.
I ink my ideals without attempting to judge those of the others.
Writing is my way of survival.
When I write, at that moment I am in control of every specs of my life, I am powerful.
At that moment-- the world lies in my hand.
When I write, I process experience, mine and those I see in others.
I take what's inside of me, every feeling, every belief--
I try to shape them into words.
I seek to translate them into phrases of life.
I attempt to transform them into meanings.
My writings affirm my existence.
My creations represent my being.
In them, I try to reason out life--
a life in all it's complexities and contradictions.
In writing, I strive to promote a shared experience through letters.
It is an endeavor to triumph over my own isolation.
Because when I write,
I know that I am not alone in this world.
For my work would connect me to others.
Just like how others connect to me through theirs.


**here is one of my bucket list entries^^
http://pinterest.com/pin/524599056564582244/

FOR HER**

If you think that being a chick is slick--
time to think again.
There are sad realities about being a woman.
Women are socially prejudged ever since the days of Eden
when all the blame were put upon Eve
over the apple that blundered the world.
Ladies are bounded by rules all the time,
frequently victims of a double standard world.
Girls are easily scrutinized.
She is not allowed to chase her happiness
for the world thinks that as a woman she just have to wait.
She can't be so good at things she does,
for admit it or not,
the world hates it when women are in-control.
She can't act as free as she wishes,
or the world will dub her as lewd.
He can be bad, cruel and all that and it's macho.
She tries to be liberal and assertive
and she's a bitch.
Well, reality check.
She hates that male chauvinism.
She hates  COZ YOU'RE A GIRL, BUT YOU'RE A GIRL
and YOU'RE JUST A GIRL lines--
they are non-sense.
She can open her own door.
She can go home alone.
She thinks.
She chooses.
She decides.
She is in charge of her own life.
She can perfectly take care of herself.
She can do as much as he can--
and sometimes EVEN BETTER.


**for every woman this women's month^^


Tuesday, March 12, 2013

ATONEMENT

*ATONEMENT (n.) compensation for a wrongdoing


How could sorry be enough?
When you had many things to say, but did not have the words to say them.
Because language becomes an obstacle.
You know you could conjure up every words--
and yet they would still not be enough.
Still it wasn't right.
Painfully aware of your limitations,
you decided to just walk away.
It is easier that way.
Rather than face guilt.
Rather than confront anger.
You don't know any way to tell how sorry you are
for you are afraid to cause more torment.
You know that your words are meager and lifeless
compared to the gravity of pain you've brought.
And despite all your attempts to ease or lessen that hurt--
you are sure they will still be inadequate.
You're there frozen,
being scared to having said too much rather than too little.
Coz you are not that naive  to believe that everything will suddenly be just OK.
But hopefully they will.
If not today, then maybe tomorrow,
or perhaps the day after.


^^

Friday, March 8, 2013

ANOTHER SUNDAY MORNING** CHAPTER I

ANOTHER SUNDAY MORNING
CHAPTER I

Amy couldn't resist checking the time that Friday evening. A couple more hours to go and she'll be bound home. The 26 year old fashion blogger couldn't contain her excitement for tomorrow. She practically started her week looking forward to Saturday-- looking forward to her time with Carl. They only get the weekends for themselves anyway. Two days every week away from her busy city life. Two days off her hectic schedule,  to share with her guy in their own little haven. 

Two years ago, when Amy first met Carl-- she never at all suspected that she'd feel this way towards him. This guy seemed to be nothing more than the ordinary for her and Amy wouldn't even notice him then. He was not her type after all-- he is quite a prig, often times self-conscious, a bit uptight. He is in fact a loner, and that's only because no one really likes to hang out so much with a quasi arrogant hombre. You know that kind of quiet guy who just be there, keenly observe and shoots out some tangy remarks, that's Carl. And in fact , Amy thought he is slightly scary because of that.

Carl is not so much of a crowd player, although a lot of girls would find him fine-looking with his virile features-- tall, dark and bounteous. He has his fair share of girl fanatics, he has his ways when it comes to women. His manly ways attracts adorers, but Amy is not at all amused. She finds him rather snobbish, an opposite to her kind of guy. She fancies witty and funny boys, assertive yet modest males who transudes authority without intimidating others-- those are her weaknesses. Needless to say, Amy was also very surprised to have fall for him, just like everyone else.



As most love stories, Amy and Carl's started in friendship. At first, they'd go out with their friends, exchange text messages from time to time until it became a routine, and they would spend hours talking over the phone about phony things. He was once a trainee in her office, but for some reasons she didn't try probing on much further, he left. Yet, he continued reaching out to her. He maybe a snoot to most people, but he was friendly to Amy, a bit more friendly she suppose, however, for a girl like her, such attention was not particularly different. To someone who knows how to work her charms, attention is never meager. 

Amy is a bubbly soul--that's what first drew Carl to this girl. She is not at all preppy. Her childlike ways make him smile and her clumsiness amuses him. There's a lightness in her that makes him want to try to open up this time. He would always see her laughing and chatting. Such a talkative lass, he thought. It would be nice to have her around, she could be someone in his life-- a tickling noise in his quiet boxed life.



**a short story version of my novelette project for this year^^
please read on for new chapters to come...

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

VINDICATION

*VINDICATION (n.) a justification for some act or belief

PAIN DEMANDS TO BE FELT.*
If you think you can live with in suffering-- that's great.
A lot of us do feel the same.
And that is simply sad.
Pain screams for us to feel it.
It begs for our hearts to ache.
It implores for us to care.
Yet, we should not succumb to pain, we should not aid it.




Pain demands to be felt-- but it also entails to be fought.
No one wants to suffer, and yet nearly everyone seeks out pain and torment--
that is one great irony of life.
We seek pain and then we feel justified, we bruise and then we feel deserving.
We inquire torment to justify our worth. 
The more we hurt, the more we love-- and so they say.
We long for hardship to deserve victory.
Like an easy victory isn't victory at all.
And so it goes-- children burden themselves when they give up their dreams
to please their parents,
parents turning desperate when they give up their lives for their children,
couples hurting for the relationship to grow.
Seems like nothing's wrong with that,
yet  we go through all these to prove on the existence of love.
And we live not for the search of pleasure anymore--
but for the denial of all that is important.
That is the saddest tragedy of our lives.
For we use pain to vindicate one thing,
that one thing that should bring the only joy-- LOVE.

^^

*line from John Green's 'The Fault in our Stars'

Monday, March 4, 2013

A NO ORDINARY FAIRY TALE

I don't really like the Cinderella mentality--
it left a damaging influence to us.
Cinderella cast an unacceptable stereotype--
that the damsel in distress should earn the prince.
Every fairy tale princess pose to be helpless since.
(And so do those who'd want to be one.)
Waiting for a knight to save them from the tower.
Waiting for a Prince Charming to wake them up with a kiss.
It started a social enigma.
Girls cannot be so witty, cannot be so strong, cannot be so assertive, cannot be so powerful.
(Just like the "cruel" stepsisters?)
Or these Prince Charmings wouldn't like it.
Female fairy tale antagonists are the first advocates of girl power and gender equality--
and yet no knight fell for them.
Prince Charming wasn't at all amused.
(And they blame the blondes for wanting to be dumb?)
Cinderella started a superficial world.
Where you'll need a total make-over,
courtesy of the fairy godmother,
to make the prince fall for you.
(So why didn't the prince recognize the romance when Cinderella was trying on the ever famous shoe on her regular clothes--
he was the first chauvinist male.)
Cinderella is a distortion of reality--
the reality that there are more important values other than
good looks, fancy dress and trappings.
That there are no fairy godmothers to save us.
That the prince should love us in our rags and cinders.^^