VAIN

*VAIN (adj.) characteristic of false pride, having an exaggerated sense of self-importance

Once you told me that you deserve to be alone.

I regret that you feel that way about yourself.

I remember feeling sorry, being concerned.

I used to believe that no one has to be that desolated.

There are about 7 billion people in this world,

that  no one deserves to be lonesome,

no one deserves to be lonely.

And yet somehow you are the one who keep isolating yourself.

Your means, your ways, your choices--

exile you from the people who are there to give you love.

It's as if you're yearning for solitude.

For if you only appreciate enough,

you could have had more than one could wish for--

you could have had your one in 7 billion.

Yet you chase for something more--

something you don't know, something that will satisfy you.

And that is very dangerous for someone who is insatiable.

Your selfish greed failed you in appreciating

the goodness that you already have.

Coz you are ravenous, who always wants something more.

Hunting, risking and gambling your chances,

until you find something better.

Forgetting to look hard enough to see

the beauty of what you already own.

You're pushing your luck beyond its limit.

And you'll end up defeated.

You'll end up tired.

For you've chased and then you chase some more.

Until that chasing consumes you.

And you'll lose all the chances you're given.

It'll move you further away from the simple light of life and love--

to the deeper darkness of your obsession.

Of your self-made vanity.

And there, you'll be getting what you think you deserve--

you'll be ALONE.

^^

"There I was cold, isolated and desperate for something I knew I couldn't have-- a solution, a remedy, anything. I hated it. Alone and confused was the last place I wanted to be-- yet somehow I knew I deserved this."
-- Brian Kranz, A constant Suicide